Oh well, I'll make something up for you. ^^
I know!! I'll post something I've written here for you to enjoy.
Now, this as the CTC29 challenge from day 22.
Day 22: Following In Their Words
Take the nursery rhyme Humpty Dumpty and rewrite it, borrowing the voice and style of a famous writer. In case you're unfamiliar with the rhyme, here it is:
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again.
Note that you don't have to write this piece in rhyme or even as a poem. Focus on taking the story from the rhyme and crafting it in the style of the author you choose. To flex your muscles, do the exercise a second time using another author writer with a very different voice than the one you chose the first time.
And here is what I wrote. Its short and weird, but I like it. Follows in the footsteps of Raymond Chandler, who created the best Noir Detective ever... Philip Marlow.
It started like any other day. The odd ice was empty when I arrived, but business had been slow for weeks now.
Then she walked in my door. Long legs stretched up into a round body… A curse only a Humpty could pull off.
“I need your help.” She breathed, leaning on my desk.
“What’s wrong toots?”
“Its my husband. He… He had a great fall.”
Everyone had head about the fall. Dumpty was in pieces they said.
“Way I heard it, Kingsman and Horses was on the case.”
“Please. They can’t put him back together again.” She looked at me, and I saw a glint in her eyes. “No one can.”
I could see she was trouble.
“Then, what do you want?”
“He’s in pieces, but I need to know who caused the fall.”
A sharp laugh escaped my lips. “Lady, you know who. I ain't some quack you can use as a frame up guy.” Leaning close, I smiled. “You caused the fall babe and now you want to make sure your tracks are covered.”
She was fast on the draw, but I was quicker. “Turn yourself in toots.”
“I”ll share it all with you. Money, power… Love.”
“Sorry, not interested.”
Two shots rang out and she crumpled to the ground.
Life poured out of her like a spilled inkwell.
Picking up the phone, I called Detective Piper.
“Ms. Humpty just confessed to the fall of her husband… No, send the wagon… She’s in pieces.”
As I said, its not polished or anything, and it moves pretty fast. But for a short I wrote while getting my back pain zapped and frozen, then in a car.. I think its pretty good.